My Weekend

[tinyjo]

Was pretty poo actually.

Should have started off quite well - went over to Wood St on Friday to make CDs of a couple of things. Realized this was going to take a while and went to get some food from the machines. Got tuna fish sarnie and went back to CD writer. By the time CDs written and me back in my office am starting to feel a little queezy. Manage to sit through rest of afternoon. Don't get anything done as am distracted by gurgling sensations from below. Go home on bus. Journey from hell. Get home. Lie down for a bit. Alex busy with housemates again but Jeremy invites me round. Decide I really want company and go over. Vomit in Jeremy's sink. Initially feel a lot better but after a while, not so much. Play Cheapass Games. Alex finally turns up. Am too tired to deal with him. Go home and hug.

Make Alex get up first for a change and make me tea and bread and honey - think continued gurgling now hunger as no nutrition absorbed yesterday. Get up and have lunch. Still gurgly. Try to go to Lord of the Rings but sold out. Am going to go home but Alex looks really low so go to Starbucks to try to cheer him up a bit. Do love him just find it frustrating coming second to his housemates which is making it difficult for me to be as supportive as I should. Agree with him to book long weekend of private time in the not-too-distant future. Still feeling yucky. Go home. Have still got squits. Read. Have early night.

Wake up. Stay in bed reading for ages. Get up and have lunch. Read more. Make dinner (v. engrossing book). Can hardly manage all of dinner. Still have squits. Bugger. Alex rings me up and tells me that Tanaqui (strange mad friend) has decided that she would quite like to make up 2 yr disagreement. Decide am agreeable to this. Faint dither about whether to go now and get it off her mind or wait till things are calmer (she's not supposed to be excited too much atm). Decide to go now as was thinking about going out to OUSFG anyway. Finish book. Am chatted up by taxi driver on way over. Get to OUSFG. Have talk with Tanaqui. Agree to put whole thing behind us and try again. She quotes poetry at me and seems twitchy - must be the manic phase. Chat with Mike and Niall and co. Get lift home with Angharad. Sleep.

Am not quite sure what to make of it all really. Am both annoyed with and very worried about Alex which produces an emotional conflict between wanting to bitch at him and cheer him up/look after him which leads to me doing neither in a messy and unrewarding way. Whole Tanaqui thing feels strange/sudden although definitely good thing - just need time to adjust to it I think.

Comments

[oxfordslacker.livejournal.com]

This may seem a cheap shot, but I'm genuinely interested: if you thought I was worried about Archie because his preoccupation was jeopardising his job, and hence his ability to pay rent, would you feel less left out than now, when you know that my primary concern is for his emotional well-being?

I do hope you're not really feeling like you're coming second. I have, after all, dropped everything on more than one occasion in the last week to see you. However, I'm know I'm not being the best company because I am worried about Archie, and I fear I've made the tension between my desire to stay at home so I can help and my desire to see you (for both our sakes) rather too apparent when making arrangements. I feel like I'm engaging in emotional blackmail at times, though I do my best not to. I am really sorry, and as the situation on the home front improves, as it seems to be, I hope that I can make things up to you.

[oxfordslacker.livejournal.com]

Oh fuck. Rereading that last comment, it looks horribly like a round of one of those sniping, emotional, Jerry Springer-esque LJ relationshipships/public arguments that the accursed 'Random' function occasionally disgorges across one's bored, titlation-seeking mind. In two minds whether to delete it now. I assume, however, that you'll have already had it emailed to you, and it would look even worse if you went to reply to it and it had gone. So I'll type this instead, unsure of what I hope to achieve by it.

Love you, A.

[oxfordslacker.livejournal.com]

Ah, I think that that was probably it.

[tinyjo.livejournal.com]

Love you too. As said in reply to jinty, whole thing probably came across as more bitchy than intended.

See you tonight :)