Since it seems to be going round my friends list at the moment, I might as well join in and belated celebrate National (American) Coming Out Day by saying a few words about my sexuality.
I vaguely worried about my sexuality when I was in secondary school. I didn't meet any boys I fancied at all. Although there were several girls I found very physically attractive, none of them were people I actually liked so I wasn't tempted to do any exploring and get any more definite ideas. Then when I moved to Oxford I met Alex, who I fancied a lot and fell in love with pretty damn quickly (I should point out, since Alex is a gender ambiguous name, that Alex is a boy). I also met Tanaqui and Jeremy, who were not the type of women I normally went for, but I found very sexy in a sensuous way. I've gone all the way with men and a long way with women. There are still many many more women who I find sexually attractive than men so despite my relative lack of girl on girl experience I tend to identify as bi. So there you are.
I vaguely worried about my sexuality when I was in secondary school. I didn't meet any boys I fancied at all. Although there were several girls I found very physically attractive, none of them were people I actually liked so I wasn't tempted to do any exploring and get any more definite ideas. Then when I moved to Oxford I met Alex, who I fancied a lot and fell in love with pretty damn quickly (I should point out, since Alex is a gender ambiguous name, that Alex is a boy). I also met Tanaqui and Jeremy, who were not the type of women I normally went for, but I found very sexy in a sensuous way. I've gone all the way with men and a long way with women. There are still many many more women who I find sexually attractive than men so despite my relative lack of girl on girl experience I tend to identify as bi. So there you are.
Re: That just gets into silly classifications...
Date: October 15th, 2003 10:49 am (UTC)From:I just figure: sexuality is complicated, and breaking off from pre-existing convenient social structures makes one's reality still more complicated - but if one can make it work, it has to be worth it. Ultimately, you'll be true to yourself.
You know, thinking more broadly, I wonder if we're well into the age of process - that the very goal, the old way of speaking of a rule and deriving process from it has been completely turned around, or indeed jettisoned...or should be? I don't know if I'm being terribly clear - I can try to clarify that if you don't quite follow.
I guess I just figure that life is a dance, a process, a conversation - and sexuality is part of that, and is as much a conversation with yourself as the people around you and with you (and non-people, to be fully honest about the range that conversation can take). Moreover, it's a conversation that may never conclude, and perhaps shouldn't - finality is a kind of death, the antithesis of life, so embodied by sex.
Now I'm well down the philosophical-path, probably well trodden. :-)