and scents... My closest grandfather died at 102; the other 3 grandparents at ages ranging from 83 to 96. For one grandmother, the smell of her oil paints and turps, or beeswax, or basil oil, coupled with old photos, would really revive her. Roses worked with grandfather. You could, if you get the chance for a return visit, try some ambient scents, the picture albums, and even old music they might have known, to see what might help them. Meeting them in their context is one thing you can do for them.
But it is hard. People do get tired. We have been losing people this year ourselves; I have to say that euthanasia would have robbed them and us of some astonishing opportunities to cope with their deaths, but each of us in the family might have a different take on whether it was in any way "worth it". My late aunt wouldn't have wanted to go any other way than the way she did, prolonged though the process was, but my grandmother certainly didn't want to linger the way she did. But then again, I don't think she had the type of hospice care she should have had; she died some ten years ago and things have changed enormously since then....
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Date: December 22nd, 2003 01:26 pm (UTC)From:But it is hard. People do get tired. We have been losing people this year ourselves; I have to say that euthanasia would have robbed them and us of some astonishing opportunities to cope with their deaths, but each of us in the family might have a different take on whether it was in any way "worth it". My late aunt wouldn't have wanted to go any other way than the way she did, prolonged though the process was, but my grandmother certainly didn't want to linger the way she did. But then again, I don't think she had the type of hospice care she should have had; she died some ten years ago and things have changed enormously since then....